Sending lots of hugs, good thoughts, and love your way, friend♥
The responses from the previous message were astounding. You guys are a bunch of whole-hearted, loving, kind, compassionate and thoughtful people. It’s been an honor and a blessing having you in my life, and I hope I provide you with some value and inspiration in your life. The interactions I’m having (so pleasant and so unexpected) are reminding me to keep thundering on, doing what I feel in my heart is my purpose and duty.
Life isn’t always going to be sunshine, roses, puppies and kittens. If it was, we wouldn’t appreciate how good things really are. We’re human. We get bored. We need stimulation. We react when we feel scared, threatened, angry, tired, hungry…whenever we have a huge pain point. Our brains, though highly evolved, are still the exact same brains our ancestors had when they were doing the Paleolithic thing. Painting cave walls and burning shit was the greatest form of entertainment (…it kinda still is, but I’m a cave-type like that…easily entertained).
She is SO not getting that deposit back…
…and doesn’t give a fuuuuuuh.
Even with some time, experience, personal and human evolution, we come back to the basic fundamentals.
Our human brains…so fancy. We’re so evolved. Are we really? Why do we kill each other? Why do we harm ourselves?
Why are we afraid?
It all comes back to being vulnerable. We are flesh and blood, instincts and feelings, thoughts and emotions. That’s a lot to bear. We have these amazingly strong skeletons, beefy muscles, flexy tendons, and this huge organ (skin) encasing it all in. All in all, we’re pretty remarkable creatures.
However, we are still highly susceptible to pain. We have deep-seeded emotions. We have emotions that rise to the surface. These things are uncomfortable. We want to escape. We want to feel something, ANYTHING other than that pain.
That’s a lot going on at once…poor Eric!
Here’s the thing about vulnerability – it’s necessary. We either face it, feel it, and embrace it like any other shitty, energy-sucking, scary thing and then blossom, or we repress it and it FESTERS.
People ask, “how could someone do something so evil?” Well, that’s just an excessive manifestation of that repression. Some of us act out quicker on our Shitty First Draft.
Either way, it’s okay. That is what is most important to realize – it’s okay.
I had a drag-out screaming match with this lately and it’s only with the help of my network and my recovery fellowship that I’m keeping my spirits up, staying clean, sober, fit and healthy. It’s so, SO important to surround ourselves with people who are wise, successful, and thriving. If you look around your network and discover that you’re the smartest, richest, most fit and most successful person in your circle, honey it’s time to level up. Suck it up and branch out. Be brave. You can do it 🙂
It takes courage to show up and be seen. Courage…a fabulous word. The root, cor is Latin for heart. The word translates into this: To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.
How lovely is that?! I love it ♥
That means we don’t have to be “perfect” (GOD, what awful word and concept altogether) to be whole. We just have to be, as-is.
Show up, and be seen. As we are.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”
Our darkness isn’t a defect. It’s an asset. Our flaws are actually quite beautiful.
“You must go into the dark in order to bring forth your light. When we suppress any feeling or impulse, we are also suppressing its polar opposite. If we deny our ugliness, we lessen our beauty. If we deny our fear, we minimize our courage. If we deny our greed, we also reduce our generosity. Our full magnitude is more than most of us can ever imagine.” – Debbie Ford, The Dark Side of the Light Chasers
It’s a lot to take in. Oooooh buddy do I know it. It’s a daily work-in-progress. So, I’ll keep coming to you, with full sincerity and authenticity, as the Dark Horse with a Bright Light, and as the Imperfect Coach for Imperfect People.
Who needs those “perfect” people anyway? I don’t even hang out with them, if such a thing exists.
Wherever you are, whoever you are and whatever is going on, you are important. You have immense value. You are loved for exactly who you are today.
Wherever you want to go my friend, just show up and be seen. That’s my challenge to you. It’s a personal challenge as well. I’ll do it and will report back. It’s no simple task, but every challenge, whether it’s a 30-mile skate in the rain or continually going for opportunities and getting shot down, the approach is all the same. Dust, sweat, tears and stumbling…keep going.
With strength, faith, and love,